Chronic Ama

I long to be on the go, to be outside in the warm January sun. I want to finish all the things I've started today.... the laundry in the washer, dryer and couch. The dishes in the sink from breakfast and the freezer meal prep this morning. The pantry in need of a clean out to make dinner menus and put away today's groceries. The little details I've started in the patio in acrylic paint. Lastly, my planner in need of my inked ideas for getting through the next week and a half so I can begin planning my recovery. I feel robbed and almost victimized by my illness right now. More so because it feels more than evident that something else is at play. My feet and hands hurt badly. Last night, I clung to my husband's chest as the lower part of my back tightened and released again and again for what seemed like endless moments. I held back my tears because I didn't want to ruin our evening vegetation ritual that we both desperately need through the week. I watch little old