Chronic Ama

 I guess I was meant to open Blogger today and see the blog my daughter left for me last April, at the beginning of the pandemic. I must have had a flare up at the time. It was probably stress about the world being on fire.  That actually is a great opener for why I'm back. It's been on my mind so much lately to keep blogging about being a chronically ill mother. Mom is a tough job in itself, but there are so many more variations when it comes the Chronically Ill Mom job. I'll just take things day by day here and see where we end up at.  I've been feeling down today because I got a migraine yesterday morning that started with pain in my neck. I think my nerves have regenerated rather quickly following the ablation I had done in April. My migraines had started 2021 with an intensity only matched by my uncontrolled fibromyalgia flares. I had cervical medial lateral nerve ablations done starting at C3 and then going up and down to burn off all the nerves that were the culp

This week I'm focusing on moving forward. Even with the beginning of a new month, I have felt stagnant and unable to step out of my comfort zone. I don't like always being in my comfort zone because my heart and mind long for so much more.  It's amazing how things work themselves out once you relinquish your hold on correcting them. Sometimes a deep breath and stopping in the moment is all it takes. Now, I think I am able to take better hold of my health, even if there is still a rough road to travel. I can see how all things are connected and I have a plan to make it over that hump. My goal is to have both my migraines and my leg pain well controlled by June.  First, I am trying new meds and starting physical therapy again. I am back on muscle relaxers to stop a lot of the spasming in my hips. It has helped tremendously in the last few days. I am also back to wearing this cursed abdominal binder. I never wear it long after surgery because it's uncomfortable.

More appointments today. I can't catch a break. My days are busy and I don't want them to be. I am anxiously awaiting vacation in October. Hopefully next week will slow down so I can start making packing lists and all that fun stuff. Today I did my sets is squats. I am going to try some heat when I get home and sit down to pay bills. Maybe I'll be able to hit the treadmill this afternoon and finish with some stretching. I haven't stuck to my plan.  So the treadmill didn't happen and I got hit with fatigue really bad again. Looking at the calendar, it's that time of the month for migraines and all the shit that comes with my phantom cycle. I guess now is where I cross my fingers and hope the preventative meds work their magic so I am not left with a migraine that lasts for days on end. My week is too busy for that.  Tuesday Update: I took my Maxalt (med to abort a migraine) at bed time last time and I pretty much passed out within minutes, like

Yesterday was a long day. I had a bunch of errands to run after seeing my new dentist. But, much to my surprise, dentists have this amazing new tech that enables them to replace a crown in one afternoon. My dentist appointment ended up being over 4 hours with no time for anything else. I also learned that sitting in a dentist chair for that long brings in hellacious spasms in my right leg. I can't help but feel my body is just done with everything. Every step forward these last few weeks still sends me into some kind of flare up. I just can't win, no matter how much I try. And I feel stuck because I still have a lot to do and less and less time to do it. Hell, it's almost noon time and I'm back in bed nursing a headache so it doesn't turn I to a migraine. I'm almost wondering if I should try my new medicine to see if it helps..... I just don't want to be comatose all afternoon. I want to proceed with the day's plans. I'll let you know what h

I skipped a day again. I was tired yesterday. And today was a little rough. I had to come to terms with my health a little. I push myself a lot. I ignore my body a lot. I do it because I always want to do more, do better, keep going. And I can't. I really need to take a step back and find my balance. I have a plan, though! And I'll share it little by little as I think putting it out there may just make me stick to it. First, I am arranging to take a leave from work for a little bit. I am seeing a plethora of doctors next month, both new and old. My goal is to have them help me solve these migraines that have been leading to bigger and bigger flare ups. I need to get on the correct HRT that will help me avoid both the migraines/flare ups and the faster return of pain causing Endo lesions. Once that is done, I need to really balance what I can and can't do. If I have to limit my work hours to relieve some stress, then I need to stick to that. And I also have to learn to lis

Yes, I skipped a post yesterday for August Twentieth. I had a long day and at the end, I just wanted to be in bed with my husband catching up on our shows from the weekend. (We're fans of Preacher and Fear The Walking Dead). Today I was still tired. I think it's party because of the new med I'm on to prevent migraines and partly because I'm still nursing my way through last week's crap. My muscles are still achy. My legs feel like lead. My hips hurt. My pinkie finger on my right hand doesn't feel the same, it randomly falls asleep and then sometimes it just doesn't work. Ugh! I worked on the floor today and walked around so much my back was spasming by 11am. Thankfully I keep my muscle relaxers with me and I bought this awesome little CBD vape pen. I think the combination really saved me today. Tomorrow I think I may have to take ibuprofen every four hours to see if that helps prevent more spasming and maybe helps my legs and hips feel a little better. I

Four days of feeling tired, pained and sick and I'm finally starting to feel normal again. I actually can't wait to get back into the routine of the week on Monday. But, yes, until then I will be taking it easy and resting all I can. We have a movie planned and baths and facials for the afternoon. Dinner will be sirloin steaks on the grill and veggies. I'm getting to enjoy some time outside this afternoon. It's not as hot out and laying in the pool and watching the clouds is so soothing. I am wondering when we'll get more rain. Tomorrow we'll get to spend some time planning the kids birthday party next month. We have our vacation planned for October this year, when the kids are on fall break, instead of in September when they'd have to miss school. Oddly, I have nothing to really muse about today. Just kinda taking things as they come and mentally preparing for next week. My brain is a little quiet today. Usually happens when I don't feel well.

Today I begin the daunting task of finding a new OBGYN as well as scheduling all my follow ups for the rest of the year. I barely have the energy to do this, but it's gotta get done. Seeing my primary today so I can hopefully get a B12 shot and a shiny new referral to follow up with my endo specialist in Phoenix. I also need to create a document with all my previous surgeries, doctors, medications, etc. I am so not in the mood for this today. I don't think I'm ever in the mood to look back on all this. My to-do list isn't all medical records and appointments, though. I will be putting an application in to be a contributing writer to a digital health community that I have been following for some time. I figure another writing project won't hurt. It's been great for me these last few weeks and I intend to keep up on it, as well as keeping up on my health routines despite this week's set back. I really should be used to these flare ups as I know the s

No blog post for the Thirteenth as I landed myself in the ER with, what we now know, was the worst migraine I've ever experienced. About 4:15 yesterday, I got extremely dizzy and my vision went blurry, worse than any migraine aura I've ever had. 45 minutes later, I was light headed, could barely move and just wanted to sleep. Fast forward to the ER, where they thought I was having a stroke. I don't even know what all went on last night as I was so out of it.  I've spent the day resting, which was doctor's orders. I'm supposed to avoid sun, screens and stress. And I need to rehydrate as my potassium was really low (again).  I'm ending here. My head still hurts and I'm weak. The couch is calling.